LOVE's got a lot to do with it ~ Note to Self: I love you: It's not about BEing Selfish, its about BEing in Self-Love

Growing up, I remember how important it was for me to "be there for others". So much so, that I grew up and forgot about me. Like many, I believed that putting others before myself was the way to BE a good person and that thinking about my needs before another's was an act of selfishness. After many stumbles, falls and scraped knees, I learned that Self-Love was not an act of selfishness but an act of empowerment. If I was unable to love myself, how could I expect another to love me. Loving ME had to start with ME and I realized that I NEEDED to learn HOW TO love myself if I wanted to evolve into the best version of myself. From that day, I made a promise to myself that I was going to make a commitment to putting myself #1 on my TO LOVE list.

With Valentines Day just around the corner, decorations of pink, red and white hearts remind us that "love is in the air". The tradition of purchasing chocolates and candies, flowers and cards are expressions of love that we share with another and we take time out to organize something special to show that person or persons how much we LOVE them. I want you the answer this question and reflect on your answer: Do you take time out to express to yourself how much you LOVE yourself and how do you do this? In this article, I want to propose a Self-Love Practise that you can implement in your day to day life. The intention of this practise cannot BE purchased, it is not meant to BE temporary and its should not BE unexpressed. I want to encourage you to BEgin to connect to YOUR heart more often and share with YOURSELF expressions of LOVE. BEgin as I did by placing yourself at the top of your TO LOVE List.

Here are a few impactful ways you can express to yourself how much you ARE LOVED:

Make Peace with Yourself: most of us want to be perfect but the reality is, we are not and nor can we ever be. Perfection is an illusion and illusions are untangible and deceiving. Life is real and what we can do to live a fulfilling life is to make peace with imperfections. Life is difficult to BE LIVED when we choose to hold onto illusions that cost us our peace. Release what is holding you back from living life out loud, free flowing and happy.

 Self Exploration: it is amazing how many people don't take the time for self exploration. We live skimming the surface of who we are as a result of our "on the go lifestyle" that there is NO TIME for self exploration. The thing is, self exploration encourages us to take a deep look at our thoughts, behaviours, feelings and motivations and to discover who we really are at our root. Self exploration empowers us to embrace these roots, helps us understand and accept our dynamics and improves our communication, relationships and most importantly our self-esteem.

BE Yourself: The biological roots of self-acceptance run deep within us and it is something that we have nurtured since we were children. There are 2 counter forces at play here. "Fitting In" vs 'Being Original". How do we keep socially accepted yet honour our authentic self? Acceptance. In order to BE yourself you need to accept yourself. When you accept who you truly are, you are being honest with yourself and with others. When you accept yourself, it is easier for you to accept others as well for who they are. With acceptance, we learn how to BE together without desire, expectation or intentions to change one another. With acceptance you unravel, discover a different approach to FITTING IN.

Avoid Unhealthy Relationships: is all about choice. We have a choice as to who we want to share our time with. Our time on this earth is precious and many of us, myself included, have shared time within unhealthy relationships. Question remains, why? The answer I give is that we don't value our self-worth. We don't feel that we are good enough. We feel that there is something wrong with us and we need to change. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Only when we choose to respect ourselves and value our worth can we put that strength back into ourselves and walk away. Unhealthy relationships deplete our enthusiasm to live life happy so why waste your time?

Saying I love you: kinda funny isn't it? you standing there, in front of your mirror, look at yourself and tell yourself " I Love You"? This exercise was uncomfortable for me in the begining but as all new habits are, I just needed time and dedication to ME to begin truly feeling all the reasons why I love myself. This is an important exercise to practise and I encourage you to START, TODAY. Take a look in the mirror, look into your eyes and tell yourself how much you love the reflection staring back at you. What we say to ourselves has such a great impact on how we feel, how we treat ourselves and what we tolerate from other. If we dont love ourselves, how can we expect others to love us?

Learn to LOVE your body: this is a BIG one! Loving your body is essentially RESPECTING your vessel. We can be so critical and superficial about ourselves that we don't even realize how much damage we cause when we harm our bodies with negative thoughts, emotions and actions. Loving your body means RESPECTING yourself by nourishing your body with acts of LOVE and KINDNESS. Appreciate and honor your body everyday as it is the vessel of your BEING. BEing Healthy, BEing Happy, BEing HERE.

 Forgiveness: a flower cannot flourish to its full beauty when its being held by a clenched fist just as we cannot live to the fullest when we choose to hold onto something that is costing us our peace. Forgiving oneself and others is the act of RELEASING stagnant energy so that we can move forward and evolve into the best version of ourselves. Forgiveness cleanses our mind so that we can embrace and live in calmness and peace.

Comfort Zone: as the quote states "normality is a paved road; it's comfortable to walk but no flowers grow". Personal Development is an important growth process that helps us explore and discover newness is our routine lifestyles. Yes, it's so much easier living in repeat, but no growth can happen if we stay withing the walls of our comfort. Try something new. You will be thankful for the positive change personal development will have in your life A recipe for self-love A dash of meditation, and a sprinkle of affirmation Find a quiet space. Sit with your legs crossed. With a long straight spine, tuck your chin in slightly to wards your chest. Envision that there is a string attached to the crown of your head, lifting your crown up towards the ceiling. Place your palms down facing and resting on your knees. Close your eyes. Let your eyes be soft, soften the tension lines of your forhead and around your mouth. BREATHING DEEPLY through your nose and out through your nose. With every inhale, say the below affirmations to yourself, out loud. With every exhale release any feelings that you are holding in your mind & heart that are refraining you from connecting to the affirmation. Repeat each affirmation 3x. Once you have completed the affirmations, bring your hands in prayer at heart centre and say " I thank myself for loving myself everyday"

I AM PERFECT even in my imperfections that make me who unique.

I AM CONNECTED to my inner thoughts and feelings and understand my needs.

I AM ACCEPTING myself and I desire to live a life that is aligned with my authentic self.

I AM WORTHY of respect and I am more than good enough.

I AM LOVING myself as because I deserve to be loved and my life has value.

I AM RESPECTING my body as it is the vessel that carries my life.

I AM RELEASING that which holds be back from evolving into the best version of myself.

I AM OPEN to new possibilities that will bring positive growth into my life.